During my pregnancy I was labeled as “high risk”, due to bleeding complications. After 13 weeks, I was placed on strict bed-rest. With many trips to the ER, when I was 24 weeks I was admitted to the hospital. Christian was born at 27 weeks (August 2007) and weighed only 2 lbs & 9 oz. After I was released from the hospital I returned to work and would commute over an hour one-way to be with Christian until visiting hours were over. On the weekends I stayed at the Ronald McDonald house and I would spend the days beside Christian’s incubator. On Christians 13th day of life I arrived at the hospital to find a PICC line was placed on the top of my son's head. The doctors informed me that during a PICC placement procedure Christian lost too much blood and now required a blood transfusion. As soon as I was able to gather my emotions I called Christian’s biological father and he was able to go to the blood bank to provide the blood that Christian needed for the transfusion. As a new mother coping with postpartum coming in for my daily visits to see a PICC line in Christians head was devastating, but then to find out that a blood transfusion was needed was completely heart wrenching. (((Christians father never saw any reason to visit Christian more than once a month while Christian was in the NICU, because the doctors were more than qualified to take care of Christian. So I made all but 1 trip a month by myself, which also did not help with the post-partum))) Christian remained in the NICU for just over 3 months before he was able to come home. Prior to Christian being released from the hospital we were provided information for a Urologist to contact for the circumcision to be done after Christian was able to meet the minimum weight requirement. Three months later Christian was eligible for the procedure to be completed. After the circumcision and several trips back to the urologist due to the amount of bleeding Christian was experiencing. I was told that I was an overprotective paranoid new parent and not to worry that the bleeding would eventually stop and that this was normal. Weeks later the incision did heal, but still no tests were even suggested or done for Hemophilia.
Finding a passion and being able to live out that passion is a rare experience. This is definitely the case for Dr. Joseph Moleski. Joe was diagnosed with Severe Hemophilia A at six months old due to a joint bleed in his knee. There was no family history of hemophilia so his parents were quite surprised by the diagnosis. Fortunately, Joe’s parents were very supportive throughout his childhood and allowed him to live as normal as possible. They were cautious but also compromised with Joe when it came to sports and physical activities. Joe enjoyed basketball and several other sports during his childhood. Joe’s younger brother, who also has severe hemophilia a, plays basketball and is very active.
Joe suffered a few major injuries while he was growing up. He had two shoulder surgeries, because those were his targets joints. Since surgery, he has full range of motion in both shoulders now. At the age of 13, when Joe’s younger brother was born, he decided it was time to be in control of his health and set an example for his brother. He began self-infusing and being more proactive about his prophylaxis schedule. Joe wanted to be more independent and also set a positive example. This was the first major turning point in Joe’s life. He wasn’t going to let hemophilia define him; he was going to take control of his health as much as possible.
The second major change in Joe’s life came when he was a junior in high school. He hadn’t focused on his grades at all up to this point. He was living a positive life in other areas, but school was a struggle due to bullying and being misunderstood. Joe decided it was time to change his grades, he set a goal to have a 4.0 grade average. He applied himself in math and science, and a few months later, he reached that goal with a perfect average. He decided at that moment, he was going to use those abilities to help others. Joe knew he wanted to go into the medical field.
Here are 5 things I've learned from living through a crisis...
As we all learn how to respond to the COVID-19 crisis, it has made me reflect on previous lessons I've learned from going through past crises.
You might decide to unfriend me or, at the very least, not stand next to me during a lightning storm after you hear this, but here goes. I have gone through more than my fair share of crisis in my lifetime. From living through hurricane Katrina in New Orleans, getting married during 911 travel restrictions, starting a career in financial planning after the 2001 market crash, working as a stockbroker during the great recession of 2008, having ten significant surgeries as a person with a bleeding disorder, losing a child, extreme financial hardships, the threat of HIV, Hepatitis B & C, and so much more. After all of these events, I can say I have learned a lot, but there are a few things that stick out that I believe might be helpful to us all while we face this new crisis of a worldwide pandemic.
Here are 5 things that I have learned that have helped me when trying to survive a crisis.
1 - Evaluate - Assess the circumstances, take a breath, and organize your priorities
2 - Educate - Remember the resources you DO have, embrace your losses, look for new opportunities
3 - Articulate - Communication is critical, staying positive is essential and defining next steps is vital
4 - Take action - Move forward, pivot away from things that don't work quickly, and set short goals
5 - Rest - Take care of you
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Today, Debbie de la Riva is a champion in the hemophilia community. Her experience in social work and community advocacy in the bleeding disorder community is echoing across the nation. However, 20 years ago she had never heard of the disease. She discovered she was a carrier when her son was born in 1994. Since then she has spent her career passionately advocating for the hemophilia community.
Debbie and her husband Jorge made it a priority to attend the memorial session at each annual meeting in order to learn more about all the history and tragedy that occurred in the community in the past generation. While she and her family have become incredibly involved, It wasn’t until the tragic death of their friend and the hemophilia communities beloved Barry Haarde that Debbie recognized the austerity of depression among people living with hemophilia. “If this can happen to this superhero prototype, what else is going on in our community?” Debbie described her revelation of how common depression in the hemophilia community is, and it motivated her to learn more. She was enlightened to learn that depression in the bleeding disorder community was a bigger problem than what was currently being discussed and wanted to do something about it.
Marc Pangilinan is a man of many firsts. He is a first generation (native-born) citizen in his family. He is also the first person to be diagnosed with hemophilia.
Marc’s parents are originally from the Philippines, where the culture tends to be very private. Because of this, Marc did not participate in the hemophilia community growing up. He visited his HTC (Hemophilia Treatment Center) when it was necessary, but he knew no one else with hemophilia until he was 26 years old. Marc was born in 1987, during a time when hemophilia wasn’t very well understood and parents were afraid to let their children play with anyone that had hemophilia. Marc felt very alone.
Because Marc was born in the 80’s, he was among some of the first to receive factor as the primary method of treatment. Besides being considered experimental, there was a shortage of it and it was very expensive to obtain. This meant that Marc did not get factor like he should have, which lead to his ankle becoming a major target joint. Luckily, Marc’s mother was a nurse and helped Marc stay on track when it came to infusions. Marc likes to say he was “sheltered not babied.” His mom instilled in him the belief that this was the life he was given so he needed to live it to the best of his ability. This helped Marc become independent and okay with being alone while having hemophilia.
Lisa and Jeff’s story began 11 years ago, when they got married. Jeff is an E7, Sergeant first class in the United States Army. He has proudly served our country for 18 years. That in itself is just amazing. But this isn’t all their family has to brag about. They have overcome many things that families today don’t ever have to think about.
In 2011, Lisa gave birth to their first child. A baby boy. To most this is one of the happiest times of their lives, but things were a little different for the Story's. When Jaxon was born, Jeff was deployed in the middle east. Although Lisa was lucky to have family there during her delivery, it still didn’t feel “right”. She didn’t want to go through this experience without Jeff, but as a military spouse, unfortunately, being alone happens more often than we would like.
Her first night alone with her new baby was one of the hardest nights of her life. In the middle of the night, she lived a real life nightmare. Doctors rushed her baby away, after having complications from his circumscision. Luckily, the hospital she delivered at had a great HTC and Jaxon got a proper diagnosis immediately. He was diagnosed with severe hemophilia type A, and given a factor infusion to resolve the bleeding issues. This is when things got rough; things got real.